what am I expecting?

from the ceaseless mountain range,
to the shimmering waves of the river
I am running through the meadows of pain, sorrow
without any support
I'm running, expecting a lending hand to borrow.

I, expect myself to be me
a beautiful, charismatic, charming, me
that endures beauty,
pleases the audience
keeps myself fit and fine
I try my best not to have brunch n dine
what I expect from myself is infinite
it is beyond my imagination.

I know I don't chase my passion.
I let it be my expectation

After addiction last time, I would talk about "expectation". Truly, we expect many things from many people. This doesn't only happen to adults, but everyone. A child expects his/her parents to bring him/her toys and gifts. A teenager expects his/her parents to give them some space(which is not true everywhere). An adult expects his/her boss not to put pressure or if so, they expect their families to create less trouble. An old person expects his/her grandkids and kids to spend time with him/her. Expectation is the feeling or belief that something will or should happen.

Now we know we expect at all ages. But did you notice, that we expect from our close ones only? This is because they give us love, enough love that we begin to expect. Internet says "expectation kills happiness" and I strongly believe it. Loving someone without expecting anything is unconditional love. Well we are not going to talk about love. Expectation, according to me, is of two types. The first one is a healthy expectation, which is usually from yourself. The other one, in simple English, is "greediness".

How to get over with expectation? Well that will make each of us a whole different human being, a better, wiser version, though. This brings in the fact of a person take up simplicity, becoming ordinary. This is not my advice, it's just my opinion. Being simple means, reducing the problems we have. I know being in 21st century, no one acknowledges the simplicity but that is a method, according to me that keeps us away from expectations.

"The world turns to a new day, new thoughts and new experiences. But then it ends after a 24 stay, I faze in disappointment. Where did this feeling of sadness or dissatisfaction come from? It came from your expectations, your list that was left incomplete." That concludes how expectations can harm us at any cause. But I can expect myself to be who I am, be a better version of me, rather than become a superstar of a Hollywood film, knowing that the idea is not valid for me. Although, expecting too much gets worse. I think we have a good idea about this expectations.

See you in a while :D
You can sip more tea 🍵
~Anusha Ranasingh 

 

Till then.

stepping into(out of) addiction.

the road to that point of life is untrodden it is miry, dirty, and unreachable the mind is rotten as it keeps doing it over and over till when my impetuous soul gets to be its own controller I'm glad where I'm but my habits keep far as from me on the meadow to the corona of the star

I envy myself for my habits have no limits and I, thereby am productive for a few minutes the desire to fulfill me is getting torn apart it's a feeling when you realize it you prepare for a new start.

Welcome to the world of addiction, satisfaction, internet. Read from a teenager, how blah blah. I'm not going to do the advertisement, I will hop into the fact. When I'm addicted, I'm tired. I'm the first person to know it. The norm of society to let us know about addiction, according to me, is false. Our source of knowledge internet defines addiction as an inability to stop using a substance or engaging in a behavior even though it is causing psychological and physical harm. Well, it doesn't have to be drugs only. It can be anything, even scratching on a surface or binge-watching anime.

Now when I look up into the genius, I-Know-It-All, well I'm talking about Google, I find "Substance abuse" and articles on "How do drugs get you addicted". Here's what I've to say, even if I'm away from drugs I keep craving junk food. I keep scribbling on the pages of my notebook. It's addiction, not a disease. Because I seek addiction as a condition and our society checks it out like a disease. Be truthful to yourself, you know your addiction. Once we are addicted it takes a huge power/labor to get out of this condition.

Here, if you still don't understand. Here is your situation: You are in a void, floating in dark, gloomy air. Surprisingly, gravity doesn't work for you. You think it's your power, as you see very few people down and others floating at different levels. When you look down, you see the wise people only. And the more you do one particular thing, the more you feel being pulled, towards darkness along with many others doing different things again and again. You are being pulled, you feel the energy. That energy, you see, is addiction.

"It is sorrow, as detected by my brain. Even though I am addicted, I can't help myself to get out of this grasp. I get enclosed, and when the weird force is applied, I get hurt" this is what my mate had to say. Addiction takes time to get over with but is easy to catch on to. Truth said addiction is will. Will to repeat, will create a bad habit.

"Addiction is something that makes you fall for it. You find it satisfying, more like love with advantage." this is what my other friend had to say. The problem with addiction is an intricate topic. Now, the most common one is the "mobile phone". Well, we all know it explains itself. As said earlier, addiction is a condition, but it can lead to disease. So, here's how I would end this article. Let's try not to be addicted. Let's come to the ground, avoid the dark, void.

See you in two days :)

You can have tea till then 🍵 ~Anusha Ranasingh

Till then.